A Little bit of this and a little bit of that. . .

As promised, here is the past year (April 2009-June 2010) in pictures (in no particular order).

I graduated from Pre-K.
I saw Santa!
I made snow angels.
I made snow people with Daddy. It's our snow day tradition.

I went sledding for the first time. It was redneck sledding, but that still counts, right?
I visited Shiloh National Park.
I went on my first paddleboat ride. I was a big help paddling!
I got my very 1st real haircut.
I made lots of wishes!
I hunted for Easter eggs.
I saw the Easter Bunny. I wasn't scared this year!

I tried my luck at catching a trolley in New Orleans.

I played on lots of playgrounds!
I had a great 5th birthday party!
I got my first scooter. I love riding on it.
I was a Princess almost every day.
I had lots of fun with my friends!
I ate LOTS of ice cream!
I stayed pretty busy making Mommy and Daddy insanely happy.
I was really cute.
I was a Fairy Princess.
I posed for lots of pictures. This makes Mommy happy; it's her favorite thing to do-take pictures of me.
I played lots of dress up. Mommy and Daddy say I have the best imagination ever.
I was just generally a beautiful, sweet little girl.
I made more wishes.
I had a few unhappy moments. Usually because I wasn't getting my way.
I spent lots of time playing with my school friends.
We had a really awesome time with our family at the lake! This is one of my favorite times of the year!
I jumped off a diving board for the very first time.
I got SUPER brave at the pool!
I went tubing. I LOVE going fast!

I went to St. Louis. We even went up in the Arch! It was SO HIGH!

I took a trip to Alex City to visit Aunt Sherri and my cousins. Aunt Sherri even let me drive the boat!
I taught Daddy proper marshmallow roasting technique.
I had my 5 year old photo shoot. Mommy was so proud of me.

I visited "Baby Bella" at the zoo. When I was really little, Mommy and Daddy told me this was a statue of me when from when I was a baby. I still totally believe them. I have to give my statue a kiss every time I visit.
I fed baby goats.
I went to the Orpheum to see The Wizard of Oz ballet. I love the Orpheum!
I went to the Orpheum to see the Nutcracker.
I discovered my silly side-I'm really quite funny!
I got really brave and jumped off the side of the pool for the very first time!
I saw my very 1st double rainbow! It was so beautiful!!

I got a new puppy, Lily. She was a rescue and is 3 years old.

I practiced being nice to my Brother. A little. I still need to work on this one.
I had a REEEAALLLY great Christmas!
I got my first dollhouse.
I was a bumblebee in a ballet.
I tried out cheerleading. I liked the pompoms, but other than that I'm not too sure how I felt about it.

I got my first trophy. I liked that part!
I did a LOT of drawing! I even went to art camp!
I snuggled with Lily
I found my 1st real best friend.
I took a trip to New Orleans.
I turned 5!
I started writing the grocery lists. This one says: popcorn, pizza, juice, turkey, and cinnamon rolls.
I had Cheetos for the 1st time. Needless to say. I loved them.
I started Pre-K. This is my 1st day.
I was a Princess for Halloween
I went horseback riding
I cooked s'mores at Papa's big camp out party
I was "Beautiful Cloud" for Thanksgiving
I made cookies for Santa with Daddy
I drew on my easel a LOT!
I saw the Sleeping Beauty ballet

It's Been Awhile

Ok so I realize it's been a ridiculously long time since my last post, but at least one of my excuses is a good one! Honestly, every time I tried to log in to post on my blog, it turned into a 30 minute battle to the death-me against the computer. The computer always won. It would tell me my password was incorrect, my user name was incorrect, or, and this was my favorite, it would let me in, but then tell me I was not the author of any blogs. Eventually it would irritate me to the point of giving up. After a while, I was just over the trouble. So I quit. But, thanks to my wonderful husband, it seems all of the kinks are worked out and I am going to try again.

Since it's been such a very long time, I am simply going to post a couple of pictures from each month that I feel best sums up what was going on that month for us.

Get ready, here comes a million pictures!

All Grown Up and I Don't Know What To Do

Yesterday we took the Little Princess to see Toy Story 3 (GREAT movie), and while we were walking in we ran into some friends going to see it too. These friends were there with a giant group of their friends so there ended up being about 30 of us sitting together, and of course, as usually is the case, Bella was the youngest one there. This is where tragedy struck. I knew this day was coming. I tried to prepare myself. I failed.

As we are all picking our seats Bella looks up at me and says, "I want to sit with Sara Kate mommy" (who is 9 years old by the way). Now this may not sound like a big deal to you but let me explain. Bella is my movie buddy. Every time we go to the movies we sit together. Not just together, but she sits in my lap. We laugh together, we cry together, we snuggle. It's perfect. Not this time. She wanted to sit by Sara Kate. Sara Kate was in a whole different row! Far away from me. How was I supposed to see what parts made Bella laugh or cry when she was so far away? I hated it. But of course I said ok. I think spent as much time watching Bella as I did watching the movie. I hated not being able to share in her reactions.

After the movie, while we were talking about all of her favorite and not so favorite parts, I threw a little Mommy guilt trip at her (I ADMIT IT!) and said, "I sure did miss you sitting in my lap while we watched the movie. I love when you sit with me. I was a little sad we didn't get to snuggle." And in the sweetest, but ever so slightly exasperated voice, she tells me, "It's ok Mommy, sometimes I just want to sit with some other friends." OUCH.

Like I said, I knew the day would come when she would want to be with her friends more than me, I just don't think I expected it so soon. It's heartbreaking. It was just another subtle reminder that my little girl is turning into my big girl more and more each day. But with any luck she'll be my snuggle buddy for a long time to come.

Dream a Little Dream.

Sometimes I swear Bella lives in her own imaginary place away from the rest of us. A place full of princesses, and castles, and music, and color. A place that she is always royalty or a beautiful ballerina. Sometimes I wish I could go there with her. But what is it about being an adult that hinders you from being able to really let go and escape to that beautiful imaginary place that most of us had as children? So, now I am content to watch her play and dream and live in a world full of magical things that only she can see. I want to be the protector of that wonderful world and keep the real world away. I want to prevent anyone from stifling that wondrous creativity that she carries with her always. 

I love that almost everything she touches instantly becomes something else, something more wonderful in her eyes. I love that she has imaginary friends that go everywhere with her and keep her safe. I love that in her world, all words can be made into songs. I love that to her, anything is a stage and anytime is a good time to dance. I hope she never ever stops believing in those things and never forgets that the whole world is her stage, and I, her ever captivated audience.   

Now I Lay Me. . .

About 3 or 4 months ago, Bella got really in to saying her own prayers at bedtime, instead of folding her hands quietly while I led prayer. And while I loved sneaking peaks of her lying there with her hands folded and her eyes shut tight, I love listening to her say her own prayers so much more. The reason may not be what you think. Of course her simply saying "Now I lay me down to sleep" would be cute enough, but what really makes her prayers so special, so unique, and so. . .well, so BELLA, is that she sings them! Not only does she sing them, but she sings her own original prayers. She introduces each one of them as if it were a song on the radio, "And  now for ____" and then she launches in to the most wonderful prayers ever. Of course she prays for the usual: mommy, daddy, brother, etc, but the most magnificent things are the most unusual things she feels in her heart to pray about. There have been songs about trees, friends, our dog. The list is long, but my personal favorite prayer song of her's was "The Prayer to Jesus' Feet." 

No kidding. 

After a very proud introduction, she went on to sing the most hilariously sentimental prayer song to the Almighty's Feet. 

I can't remember most of it, but it went a little like this (insert completely random melody here) Now I lay me down to sleep, I pray the Lord to Jesus' feet. They are so pretty. And I love you. . . .etc., etc. A lyrical masterpiece, really. 

It was truly everything I had not to bust out laughing! How could I laugh though, when she was so very seriously pouring her heart and soul into her song to Jesus' feet?

Lately, she doesn't sing her prayers as much anymore, but she does still say her own most of the time. Sometimes they make sense. More often than not, they don't. They are just completely random ramblings of whatever thoughts pop into her head in that very moment.  Sometimes I am tempted to reign her in, to put her on the "right" track with her prayers. But I fight the urge. Because isn't that what praying to our Father is supposed to be? Speaking from our hearts' no matter how incoherent it may seem to us? God knows our heart; he knows what we are trying to say.  The beauty is found in knowing that we can say anything, anything at all, to Him and He hears us. He listens. Whether it be about our troubles, our joys, or even about Jesus' pretty feet. God wants to hear everything we have to say. And while I don't sing my own prayers, my little girl has taught me so much about the beauty and art of prayer.

Big Wheels Keep On Turning!

As of February 3, 2009 my little Princess is a bike rider. 

I picked her up from school that day, and she and her teachers were beaming! "Guess what?" they ask me.

 "What?" 

Dramatic pause. . . . 

At this point I'm positive she has done something absolutely amazing-taught the class to read,written her name in cursive,  solved world hunger. . . 

"BELLA LEARNED TO PEDAL!"

Who needs reading?! My kid can finally pedal!!! 

I jump around the class like a maniac, hug her and kiss her, tell her over and over that I am so proud of her. You know, the usual proud mommy stuff. I have been trying to teach her since last summer with absolutely no success; she goes to preschool for one day and comes home knowing how to do it! Maybe they aren't over charging us. . .

Like most things requiring effort and energy,  the Princess has been completely uninterested in learning to pedal a bike. I don't know why I wasn't more prepared for her total lack of interest, she didn't crawl until she was 11 months old and didn't walk until she was 17 months old. No thats not a typo, it was really 17. She was perfectly happy having her fat little self toted around on my hip forever! She's simply never been a big fan of cardio, so I'm not sure why I expected her to be excited about learning to ride a bike. But that was all in the past. 

Or so we thought.

That night when daddy got home, we told him all about the monumental day. Then Mommy, Daddy, the Princess, and even Aunt Mary all loaded into the car for a trip to Wal-Mart to get a NEW BIKE!!! After some deliberation, we decided to go with the Barbie big wheel. Why not start small, then work our way up to the BMX. She did just learn.

So after getting home and helping Daddy assemble her new prize, we all set off. The plan was for us all to take a nice long stroll around the block-grown ups walking, Princess pedaling diligently alongside us. That was the plan. Since when does anything ever go according to the plan? It took us about 10 minutes to get as far as the next driveway, 40 feet away! This wasn't bike riding! I didn't understand! Her teachers had said, "She learned to RIDE a bike today" not "she learned to pedal twice then sit on a bike today." What had happened ?? 

But she wouldn't give up. So for the next 30 minutes Daddy, Aunt Mary, and I coaxed and encouraged her to keep trying while we quietly played a game of  "I bet I could do _______ before she gets back home." Example, I bet I could run a mile backwards and on one leg before she pedaled the 40 feet it would take to get back to our driveway. It was slow going to say the least.  But then, all of a sudden, it clicked!! She started pedaling (consistently) and didn't stop! The freedom of the open road, the wind blowing through her hair, she was unstoppable! We were all so proud. It was then that I realized, pedaling, just like everything else in her life, was something she had to do in her own time. She has never been one to be forced into anything, and this was to be no different. Why had I been so adamant about her learning before she was really ready? Because everyone else's child was ahead of her when it came to this? I won't make that mistake again.

 Through the simple act of her learning to ride her bike, she taught me that it is not my job as her mommy to force things upon her. It's my job as her mommy to point her in the right direction, and to be the gentle guidance she needs to learn and discover things on her own. She is her own person, smart and able, capable of anything, when and if she's ready. 

Big Girls Don't Cry

Last Thursday, my little Princess started pre-school for the first time. Again.

A little over a year ago, we tried it, but it was awful so we quit, and we don't really like to count it as her first school experience. She would wake up on school mornings with some sort of weird sixth sense, already crying and begging me not to take her! It was terrible.

This time though it has been great! When we went to visit, she walked right in like she had been there forever, she wasn't shy or scared in the least. We knew we had found "the one." Her teachers are so sweet and she has already made lots of new friends; although she can't tell me a single one of their names.

I had a friend ask me if I was sad about her starting school, and my honest answer was no. I'm really not. (And not just bc its one less kid in my house or bc I am finally getting a much needed break from the little monster, I mean Princess). I might have thought about being sad or nervous for a minute or two. After all, this is my shy, scared baby, and I just threw her into an unknown world. It had to be really scary for her.

Any sadness I might have had though,  was erased at pick up on her first day. I got out of my car to see her running blissfully around the playground with her friends, grinning from ear to ear, laughing out loud, and having the time of her life. I knew we had made the right choice. Who could be sad about that?

31 Flavors of Jesus

Kind of a random thought I know, but have you ever noticed all the different "varieties of Jesus"?

Sitting in church on Sunday, I started thinking about it. Visit one church and you will enjoy oyster cracker Jesus. Another, and you will partake in wafer Jesus.  I wonder what makes churches chose the flavor they do. Are they just walking through the cracker aisle at Kroger one day, spot some tasty looking treats, and think "That's it!! That will be our Jesus!"? Or is it a matter of price? Is one type of Jesus more of a bargain than another? I just wonder these things.

And as far as the drinks go, WINE people!! WINE!! He turned water into wine, not Welch's grape juice. 

In my opinion, you should not be able to buy Jesus's flesh and blood at the grocery store. It should have to be purchased from a special Jesus store. 

Just my thoughts on the matter.

Hark! the Harold Angels Sing, Christ is Born in. . .Bella's bedroom??

This morning I walked into Bella's room to find her standing on her bed, huge smile on her face, and a giant bulge under her princess night gown.
"Look Mommy," she says, "I'm gonna have a baby Jesus!!" Then she reaches under her night gown and "births" a little stuffed Savior right then and there. Baby Jesus was born today in my daughter's bedroom. It's a miracle!!
She was such a great mommy to Baby Jesus all day. She wrapped Him in swaddling cloth (a.k.a. her lovie) and carried Him around with her until bedtime. Throughout the day she tended to all of His needs: she fed Him "delicious Lucky Charms" for breakfast, shared her peanut butter sandwich for lunch, she took Him potty, and even kissed His booboos (that He sustained from repeated dropping on His head! ouch! Can Jesus get brain damage??).
It was really neat to watch her "interact" with Baby Jesus all day. So many of the things she said to Him, were exactly the same things I say to her. When He'd "cry" she would hold Him and gently bounce Him and whisper, "It's ok baby, Mommy's here" just like I do with her. After He'd "potty" she would clap and cheer, "YAY!! Mommy is so proud of you!" The love and care that she showed her baby was so touching; the gentle way she tended to Him let me know that maybe, just maybe I'm doing a pretty good job as a mom. Moms, if you ever want to know what kind of job you are doing, watch your daughters playing with their babies.

last ones. . .

here are a few more pics from the rehearsal. . . .

A Star is Born 12/5/08

So tonight was rehearsal night for the Princess's very first ballet performance, The Nutcracker. We arrived really early so that I could get a good spot to photograph from , but it turns out that everybody else had the same idea. 45 minutes before rehearsal even starts there are about a million people already there. Of course this puts my little prima ballerina into freak out mode, and she assumes her usual "crowd position" which consists of her face crammed into the back of my thigh, death grip on my leg. 

Well, she looked adorable (picture this:pink leotard & tights, LEG WARMERS, [ahhh! too cute!!] and a scarf , so naturally everyone wanted to see her and talk to her. This attention only sent her into SUPER freak out mode, and she attempted to test her climbing abilities up my body.  She succeeded.

So anyways, we headed into the auditorium where we patiently waited for her group to be called up. . . .

here is a run down of the 3 year olds' parts in the performance. 1. they are dressed as gingerbread girls and they basically walk across the stage. The outfits are brown and have nothing that sparkles on them. Bella could care less about this part of the show. 2. next, they are "Christmas Girls". For this part they do an entire little choreographed  number in the most adorable costumes ever. Red velvet dresses, white fur trim, sparkly headbands. Bella would live in this outfit for the rest of her life if I'd let her.  Each time they have to put the gingerbread costumes on, I have to force it onto her and threaten her with no red dress if she doesn't do the gingerbread part. Every time she even sees the brown, she instantly says, "I want the red one." Diva.

So anyways, her group is finally called backstage to prepare to go on. I kiss her, tell her I love her, and send her on her way. Then there is a mad dash amongst the mommies for the little area right in front of the stage, all of us hoping to get front and center for the best photo ops. I won. I'm am not against violence when it comes to getting the best spot for pics of my baby.(So, other mother's beware-I won't lose.) So there we all sat, cameras aimed and ready, when the curtains are pulled back, and there stood our tiny dancers.

 I recognized all of them, except one. . . .my own. The little girl that couldn't be invisible enough only an hour before had suddenly turned into an attention crazed maniac!! She was up on the stage with the biggest smile on her face and waving to the crowd like she had just been crowned Miss Ballet America!! When the music started she really went crazy, she was like a pint sized Rockette. Dancing and moving like the stage belonged to her alone; her toe perfectly pointed the entire time . She was not the least bit scared or shy. The crowd LOVED her!!! 

When her part was over I had to practically drag her off stage. Backstage, she refused to take off the red dress until she had sufficiently modeled it in the ballet mirror-this meant at least 15 minutes of looking at herself while she made various faces and struck different poses. She had some of the other moms laughing so hard; they couldn't take their eyes off of her! No one could believe that was the same little shy girl from the lobby.  I never really expected her to to be afraid onstage, she does love to perform, but I never  expected her to come alive the way she did either. I think at three, she's found her calling.

It was an amazing night; one I know I will remember for a long time, but should I start to forget, I know she will remind me- she told me repeatedly how "AWESOME" she was the entire way home! She certainly won't be forgetting any time soon!