His 15 Spectacular Minutes

This Christmas, Granny Karen hit the jackpot when she purchased our Christmas gifts. She managed to snag front row seats to Cirque du Soleil for all of us-her, Mary, and all 4 members of my family. Freaking awesome, I know. So after two months of anticipation, we finally got to go last night. It was fabulous! It started a bit shaky though. Like I said, we had great front row seats. The not so great part though, was that before the show started, there were clowns roaming around "visiting" with the people in the front rows. This was bad for a couple of reasons. 1st: every single member of my family is TERRIFIED of clowns. They are horrendously creepy.  Personally, I think they are all secretly ax-murderers. We hate clowns. Not to mention the fact that these were not just regular creepy, circus type clowns. They were the be-all, end-all creepiest of creepy kind of clowns. Which leads me to reason #2 why front row seats weren't so great. Bella. My little uber shy, little freak-out Queen just about came unglued the second she saw the hideous things. The fact that getting front row seats is a nearly impossible feat to accomplish meant nothing to her. All she cared about was getting the hell away from the clowns! "I want to go up there!!" she screamed, pointing to the nose bleeds. But honey, these are special seats! Only the really special little girls get to sit down here. . . it was a lost cause. Telling her  these things only seemed to upset her even more. She screamed and cried, and looked at us like we must totally hate her to force her to sit this close to the terror. For a minute, I really thought she and I might soon be making the trek up the million stairs that led to the seats she so desperately wanted to be in.

Thank God for Lovey! Of course, good ole' reliable Lovey was right there on the front row with us, enjoying all the action. I finally convinced Bella that if she closed her eyes and put Lovey over her face, no one could see her. It worked. Crisis averted. 

Once the show started and all the "crowd visitors" moved on to the stage, she was fine. She actually really enjoyed the show. The "pink girl" (she wore a pink dress)was her most favorite. She was the singer, providing the soundtrack for the entire show, along with the band. Let me just tell you that she was amazing! Rob and I would pay to go to a show just to hear her sing. WOW!

So, anyways, the show itself was really great. Very unique. Lots of action. If you've never been to a cirque show, you really must go. It's not your typical circus (if you didn't figure that out from the clowns). There are no ponies walking on their back legs or elephants balancing on tiny boxes. Instead, it is more about human performance-feats of balance, strength, agility, and talent. I'm not talking about "stupid human tricks" here, just awe-inspiring acts.

Another thing that is unique to Cirque, is the music and the atmosphere it provokes. Its a very sensual type of experience. Sultry. Hot. The show really centers around the human body and the fascinating things it can do. BUT calm down people, it was still PG rated!

As amazing as all of that was though, it was not the best part. Oh no. Not by a long shot. 

But lets back up a bit. . . . 

On the way to the show, Rob suddenly says, "I just had a terrifying thought! We are on the front row. They always pick people from the front row and make them come onstage!! I will freak out if they make me do that!" Seriously, he was a bit panicked about this. Of course my reply was, "OH I HOPE THEY PICK ME!!!"

Back to the show. . . . 

about 3/4ths of the way through, the mime that provided comic relief between acts started to move towards the crowd. I watched with eager anticipation as he scanned the crowd. The row beside us. . .oh he's so close! Look this way!! I was nearly tempted to start franticly waving my arms around like the idiot kid in elementary who will just DIE if he isn't picked to answer the teacher's question. Then his eyes locked. . .  on ROB!! "He's coming for you!!" I whispered, a bit disappointedly, but I don't think he heard me. He was too bust trying not to throw up as the silly little man approached him, hand extended.

Rob apprehensively shook his hand, and then was pretty much dragged up onto the stage. Bella was screaming in fear for him, but no one could hear her over the roar of the crowd. I finally got her to calm down (Lovey over the face), and Rob's stage debut began. Poor guy, he was so scared up there, he looked like a mouse trapped in a corner by a lion, eyes wide, body tense, ready to bolt at the first hope of escape! 

Basically, the mime would act out scenarios, like sneaking through  a room occupied by an imaginary tiger, and Rob had to copy him. His first attempt was a half-hearted bomb, but the mime quickly let him know that mediocre attempts at mimicry would not be acceptable. After that 1st attempt though, Rob's face changed. He relaxed and accepted his fate as a victim of the mime, and threw himself whole-heartedly into each new skit. It was HILARIOUS!!! He was so completely awesome!! In fact, he was the funniest part of the show! Each time the mime would give him the series of things he was to mimic, he'd do it, but added his own funny tweaks. The crowd went crazy over him! I have to say, I was really proud! 

Everybody that knows him, knows Rob is a funny guy, but this was off the charts! Watching him tip-toe around the stage like a crazed explorer on safari had us in stitches! The "gun fight" was gut-busting! He was so entertaining that he was onstage for almost 10 minutes! That mime should really look out, after the crowds response to Rob, his job just might be in jeopardy! 

After the show, we all realized what a big hit he had really been. People were coming from everywhere to tell Rob what a great job he had done and how hysterical he was! "Hey there's the guy!!" people were yelling to each other as they rushed over to shake the new celebrity's hand. Some people thought it must have been set up because he was so relaxed on stage. HA! There was a big group applause in the lobby.There was even a mad rush of people to get on the same elevator with him. It was insanity! Like the local Will Ferrel or something. I was half expecting a police escort home!

He was so proud of himself! He was beaming the rest of the evening. It was adorable!

So now my baby has gotten a little taste of fame. And he liked it. Boy did he like it. Wonder how long till we move to LA and get jobs waiting tables like all the other starving actors?